Bereavement leave

What It Means

Bereavement leave is time off work after someone close to you dies, to grieve, arrange or attend a funeral and handle what follows. Federal wage law doesn't require it: the Department of Labor says the Fair Labor Standards Act leaves pay for time not worked to the employer and employee, and the Family and Medical Leave ActFMLAThe Family and Medical Leave Act, a federal law giving eligible employees up to 12 workweeks of unpaid, job-protected leave a year for family and medical reasons. See more's list of reasons doesn't include a death on its own. So the days come from your employer's policy and, in some states, a state law.

How People Say It at Work

• "I'm out for the rest of the week for my grandmother's funeral."
• "How many bereavement days do we get?"
• "Take whatever time you need."

The Breakdown

Steps for the first days (Buhata's suggestion)

1. Send a short message to your manager or HR. "My father died last night. I need to be out this week and will update you by Friday" is plenty.
2. Read the bereavement section of the employee handbook, or ask HR to tell you: how many days, for which relatives, and whether they're paid.
3. If you need more time than the policy gives, ask whether you can add vacation, sick or personal days.
4. Check your state's law. California, for one, requires leave from many private employers.
5. Agree on dates in writing, so payroll and your team have the same record.
6. Hand off urgent work to one named person and set an out-of-office reply.

Try it today. If you're writing the first message now, keep it to who died, how long you expect to be out, and when you'll check in.

California's rule, per the state's Civil Rights Department. Since January 1, 2023, private employers with five or more employees must grant up to five days of bereavement leave when an eligible employee's family member dies. The employee must have worked there at least 30 days, the leave must be completed within 3 months of the death, and it applies to each death, so losing two relatives in a year means two separate leaves. Covered relatives include a spouse, child, parent, sibling, grandparent, grandchild, domestic partner and parent-in-law. The law doesn't require the days to be paid, but you can use vacation, sick or other paid leave you have.

Good to Know

Policies vary widely by employer, so the handbook is the first place to look, and your state labor department or civil rights agency can tell you whether a state law applies. If grief turns into a health condition that keeps you from working, ask HR whether FMLA leave could apply; the Department of Labor lists the FMLA's reasons on its site. For anything unusual, such as being refused leave a state law requires, an employment lawyer can advise you.

Related Terms and Categories

• Sick leave

  Time off work an employer allows when you're ill, injured or caring for your health, paid or unpaid depending on the employer's policy and state or local law.

• FMLA

  The Family and Medical Leave Act, a federal law giving eligible employees up to 12 workweeks of unpaid, job-protected leave a year for family and medical reasons.

• Mental health day

  A day off work taken to rest and recover from stress or strain, usually drawn from sick leave or PTO under the employer's own policy.

• Boundaries at work

  Limits a person sets and tells others about at work, covering their time, workload, availability and how they're treated.

Work, career and remote life