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Learned helplessness

A psychology term for failing to use control you actually have, after repeated experience with stressful situations you couldn't control.

What It Means

Learned helplessness is a pattern described in psychology research: after repeated stress that someone can't control, they stop using ways of control that become available later. The APA Dictionary of Psychology explains it as learning that you lack control over what happens, which then drains the motivation to try to change things. In everyday talk, people also use the phrase loosely for someone who has stopped trying at a task, and that casual use says nothing about anyone's health.

Try It: Flip Through the Theory, Then and Now

Open each card to see how the idea has changed since the first experiments.

What the term means

After repeated stress you couldn't control, you stop using control you do have later. That's the sense in the APA Dictionary of Psychology.

The 1967 idea

Seligman and Maier proposed that animals given shocks they couldn't control learned their actions made no difference, and that this learning stopped them trying to escape.

The 2016 update

Fifty years on, Maier and Seligman concluded the original theory had it backward. Passivity is the default response to long, bad events, and what gets learned is control.

The everyday use at home

People borrow the phrase for someone who has stopped trying at a job. It's a casual use, and it isn't a diagnosis.

How It Sounds at Home

  • "Why bother, you'll just redo it."
  • "I stopped folding the towels, apparently I do it wrong."
  • "Honestly, I've given up offering to cook."

The Breakdown

Signs of the everyday version at home

  • Someone says "What's the point?" about a job they used to try.
  • They wait to be told instead of starting.
  • They stopped offering to take a chore after it was redone or corrected many times.

A short self-check. Think of one household job the other person has stopped doing, and answer honestly:

  1. When they did it before, did someone redo it or correct it most times?
  2. Did the two of you ever agree on what "done right" looks like?
  3. Were they given any say in how it's done?

If you answered yes, no and no, the job has been run in a way that left them little control over how it turns out. Handing it back with real say over the method is a fair place to start.

A way to start the conversation. "I think I've been redoing things you've already done, and that's on me. Would you take the laundry from now on and do it your way?"

Where It Comes From

Psychologists Martin Seligman and Steven Maier introduced the idea in 1967, after experiments in which animals received shocks they couldn't escape or control. Their theory was that the animals learned their actions didn't matter, and that this learning kept them from trying to escape later on. In 2016 the pair published "Learned Helplessness at Fifty: Insights from Neuroscience" in Psychological Review. Drawing on brain research, they concluded the original theory got it backward: passivity is the defaultLoan defaultFailing to repay a loan as the contract requires, usually after missed payments, which lets the lender use stronger ways to collect. See more, unlearned response to long exposure to bad events, and what an animal can learn is that it has control.

Good to Know

In research, the term is about stress a person truly couldn't control, and scientists have used it as a model of depression. At home it's a casual phrase that makes no medical claim. If someone seems hopeless or stuck across much of their life, a doctor or licensed mental health professional is the right person to talk to.

FAQ

What is an example of learned helplessness?

In the original research, animals exposed to shocks they couldn't control later failed to escape when escape became possible. In everyday speech, people use it for someone who has stopped trying at a task because their past efforts never seemed to count.

Who discovered learned helplessness?

Psychologists Martin Seligman and Steven Maier described it in 1967. In 2016 they revised the theory in the journalJournalingWriting down your thoughts and feelings, in a notebook or an app, to understand them more clearly and to see what's behind your stress. See more Psychological Review, based on what neuroscience had shown since.

Can learned helplessness be undone?

In their 2016 review, Maier and Seligman describe animals learning control, with a part of the brain called the medial prefrontal cortex detecting control and turning down the default passive response. For a person struggling in daily life, a doctor or licensed therapist is the right place to start.

Do It in Buhata

Household Space

In your Household Space in Buhata, hand over one whole chore with its owner named, and leave how it gets done to them.

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Related Terms and Categories

  • Fair share of chores

    The portion of a household's chores each person takes on, judged against what everyone agrees is fair given their other work and commitments.

  • Mental load

    The unseen work of noticing, planning and remembering everything a household needs, even when someone else carries out the task.

Relationships and shared household

Sources

APA Dictionary of Psychology, "Learned helplessness"; Maier and Seligman, "Learned Helplessness at Fifty: Insights from Neuroscience," Psychological Review 123(4), 2016 (PubMed Central; APA PsycNet); PubMed Central, "Assessing the relationship between the human learned helplessness depression model and anhedonia"

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