What It Means
A phone contract for kids is a written agreement, made when a child gets a phone, that spells out the rules for using it. The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) notes that some families use one to set when, where and how the phone is used, with the child agreeing to be respectful and responsible. It works best as part of a wider Family Media PlanFamily media planA written set of family rules about screens and media, such as screen-free times and places, that each household makes to fit its own routines and values. See more, the AAP's tool for setting a household's screen rules.
Try It: Build Your Family's Phone Agreement
Tick each rule you want in your family's agreement. The first eight come from the AAP's phone guidance and Family Media Plan; the last two are Buhata's own suggestions.
A short agreement is easier to keep. Add the rules that matter most to your family.
That's a solid draft. Read it aloud together and both sign it.
How Parents Say It
- "You can have the phone, but first we're signing the contract."
- "Rule three: the phone sleeps in the kitchen."
- "Read the agreement again, it says no phone at dinner."
The Breakdown
Readiness, not an exact age. The AAP's Q&A on the right age for a phone says readiness has more to do with a child's responsibility, and with whether parents are ready to help set rules, than with a birthday. Questions it suggests asking: does your child handle homework responsibly, and do they apologize when they hurt a friend's feelings?
What to put in the agreement
| Topic | What the AAP guidance suggests |
|---|---|
| Where | No phones in the bedroom overnight |
| When | No screens in the hour before bed; set expectations for the dinner table and homework time |
| How | Being respectful and responsible |
| CheckingChecking accountA bank or credit union account for everyday money going in and out, used by debit card, checks, transfers and direct deposit. See more in | Parents knowing the passcode and checking texts now and then for bullying or other concerns |
| Controls | Parental controlsParental controlsSettings and tools that let a parent limit what a child can see, download, buy and who they can contact on a device or app, and for how long. See more for time, downloads, contacts and purchases |
How to write it
- Make your Family Media Plan first on HealthyChildren.org, or at least decide the family's screen-free times and places.
- Write the phone rules in plain words your child understands.
- Add what happens if a rule is broken, and how your child can earn more freedom.
- Read it together, let your child ask questions, and both sign it.
- Pick a date a few months out to look at it again.
When to get help. If phone use starts crowding out sleep, schoolwork or time with friends, or you notice signs of bullying, talk with your child's pediatrician or school.
Good to Know
The AAP's Family Media Plan is a free online tool at HealthyChildren.org where each family picks its own rules, and the AAP describes it as something to personalize. A phone contract is one piece of that plan. The plan's screen-free times and places, like the dinner table, are meant for the whole family, adults included.
FAQ
What should a phone contract for kids include?
When, where and how the phone is used, per the AAP: for example, no phone in the bedroom overnight, no screens in the hour before bed, a parent knowing the passcode, and parental controls on time, downloads, contacts and purchases.
What age should a child get a phone?
The AAP doesn't set one age. Its Q&A says readiness depends more on how responsible the child is, and whether parents are ready to help set rules, than on the child's age.
Should parents check their child's texts?
The AAP notes that some families agree in the contract that parents will know the passcode and check texts now and then for bullying or other concerns. Agreeing to it up front means it isn't a surprise later.
Do It in Buhata
Household Notes and Reminders
Write the signed phone rules in Household Notes in Buhata, and set a Reminder for the date you agreed to review them together.
Open BuhataRelated Terms and Categories
- Family media plan
A written set of family rules about screens and media, such as screen-free times and places, that each household makes to fit its own routines and values.
- Parental controls
Settings and tools that let a parent limit what a child can see, download, buy and who they can contact on a device or app, and for how long.
- Screen-free time
Set times or places in a family's day, like meals, bedrooms or the hour before bed, when phones, TVs, tablets and games stay off.
- Online safety for kids
The habits, rules and tools that help children use the internet, apps and games while avoiding harm such as scams, cruelty, and adults who try to exploit them.
Sources
American Academy of Pediatrics, Center of Excellence on Social Media and Youth Mental Health, "Getting Your First Phone"; AAP Center of Excellence, "Appropriate Age to Introduce a Mobile Device"; HealthyChildren.org (AAP), "How to Make a Family Media Plan"; HealthyChildren.org (AAP), "Family Media Plan"; American Academy of Pediatrics, "The Family Media Plan" (Pediatrics, 2024)
- www.aap.org/en/patient-care/media-and-children/center-of-excellence-on-social-media-and-youth-mental-health/qa-portal/qa-portal-library/qa-portal-library-questions/getting-your-first-phone
- www.aap.org/en/patient-care/media-and-children/center-of-excellence-on-social-media-and-youth-mental-health/qa-portal/qa-portal-library/qa-portal-library-questions/appropriate-age-to-introduce-a-mobile-device
- www.healthychildren.org/English/family-life/Media/Pages/How-to-Make-a-Family-Media-Use-Plan.aspx
- www.healthychildren.org/English/fmp/Pages/MediaPlan.aspx
- publications.aap.org/pediatrics/article/154/6/e2024067417/199968/The-Family-Media-Plan
Last updated .