Money mindset

What It Means

Money mindset is an everyday name for the beliefs and attitudes you hold about money: whether it feels safe or stressful, whether it's fine to talk about, and what having or lacking it says about a person. The Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (CFPB) calls these financial attitudes, habits and norms, and its research says they begin forming in childhood. Creighton University describes the most deeply held of them as money scriptsMoney scriptA deeply held and often unnoticed belief about money, usually learned in childhood, that shapes how you spend, save and manage money as an adult. See more.

How It Sounds at Home

• "My parents never talked about money, so I don't either."
• "I'm just not a money person."
• "We were raised with really different ideas about spending."

The Breakdown

A short example. Ana grew up in a home where money was never discussed and every bill seemed to arrive as a crisis. Now she earns a steady salary, but when money feels tight she stops opening her bank app, and a couple of bills go past their due dates even though the money was there. Her partner, Ben, grew up with a parent who tracked every dollar, and he checks their account every day.

Where it goes wrong. Ana reads Ben's checkingChecking accountA bank or credit union account for everyday money going in and out, used by debit card, checks, transfers and direct deposit. See more as distrust, and Ben reads her avoidance as carelessness. They argue about the late feesLate feeA charge added when a payment arrives after its due date, set by the card agreement, lease or contract and limited by federal or state rules. See more, when each of them is following rules they learned as kids. Neither rule was ever said out loud, so neither one gets questioned.

What to watch for

• A strong feeling, like dread or guilt, whenever money comes up.
• "Always" and "never" statements about yourself and money.
• Spending to change your mood.
• Copying a parent's habit, or doing the exact opposite on purpose.

A way to start the conversation. Each of you finishes the sentence "In my house growing up, money was..." and then compares answers before talking about any numbers.

Good to Know

The CFPB's research on youth financial capability says children start building money habits, norms and valuesPersonal valuesThe principles and qualities a person holds most important, such as honesty, family or creativity, which guide their choices and how they judge events. See more in middle childhood through what it calls financial socialization: watching how parents, caregivers, peers, teachers and the media handle money. That means the adults in a home are shaping how their kids will think about money right now. If money worryFinancial anxietyOngoing worry or unease about money, your bills or how you handle your finances, sometimes with physical signs such as lost sleep. See more is getting in the way of sleep, work or your relationships, talk with a doctor or a licensed therapist, and a nonprofit financial counselor can help with a plan for the bills.

Related Terms and Categories

• Money script

  A deeply held and often unnoticed belief about money, usually learned in childhood, that shapes how you spend, save and manage money as an adult.

• Scarcity mindset

  The narrowed focus that comes from having too little money or time, which pulls attention to the shortage and leaves less mental room for everything else.

• Financial anxiety

  Ongoing worry or unease about money, your bills or how you handle your finances, sometimes with physical signs such as lost sleep.

• Financial literacy for kids

  The money skills, habits and knowledge children build over time, from waiting for something they want to budgeting, saving and weighing choices.

Household money and budgeting