Restorative practices

What It Means

Restorative practices are a way of running a school that puts relationships first. The Minnesota Department of Education describes two sides: everyday practices that build community among students and staff, and a way of responding to conflict or wrongdoing that brings together everyone affected to talk about what happened, how it affected them and what will restore the relationship. How they fit with consequences such as detention or suspension is up to each district.

How Parents Say It

• "They did a restorative circle instead of detention."
• "The school wants to do a restorative meeting about the fight."
• "Our district uses restorative practices now."

The Breakdown

What it looks like by grade. Buhata's suggestions, based on the two sides Minnesota describes:

If the school asks you to join a meeting

1. Ask who will be there and who will lead it.
2. Talk with your child beforehand about what happened and how they feel.
3. In the meeting, listen first, then share how it affected your family.
4. Ask what the agreement will be, who checks on it, and when.

Try it at home. Buhata's suggestion: after a fight between siblings, use the same three questions before handing out a consequence.

When to talk to the school. Ask the principal or school counselor how the school uses restorative practices, and whether a meeting is voluntary for your child. If your child was hurt and doesn't feel safe meeting the other student, say so.

Where It Comes From

The Minnesota Department of Education notes that restorative practices draw on the traditions of Indigenous peoples and communities of color around the world, grounded in the belief that people are deeply connected to one another.

Good to Know

Schools and districts set their own discipline policies, so how restorative practices fit with suspension or other consequences depends on your district's code of conduct. Read it, and ask the school if a restorative step replaces a consequence or comes alongside it. Minnesota's Department of Education has published school implementation guidance, and ERIC, the Department of Education's research library, holds an updated research review of restorative justice in U.S. schools.

Related Terms and Categories

• Social-emotional learning

  How children and adults learn to understand and manage emotions, get along with others and make caring decisions, often taught as five CASEL competencies.

• School psychologist

  A school-based specialist trained in assessment, learning, behavior and mental health, who supports students, families and teachers.

• Parent-teacher conference

  A short scheduled meeting between a parent and a child's teacher to talk about how the child is doing in school and how to help at home.

• Emotion coaching

  A way of responding to a child's feelings: notice the emotion, connect, listen, help name it, then solve the problem together, with limits on behavior.

• Emailing a teacher

  Writing to your child's teacher by email to ask a question, share news or raise a concern, ideally short, specific and polite, with one topic per message.

School and education for parents